Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Day 2 - 'Tis the season

Here I was, wondering about what to write for today's post, when a tangled mess of grad school application stuff fell right into my lap. Sometime last semester, I decided that I had not had enough of grad school and  applied to a few doctoral programs.*

Now, the results are trickling in.
And I'm very buggered. I haven't heard back from my top choice. But, I have heard (from random sources) that they've sent out the last of their invites. Of course this is not direct news from the school itself. Online forums around which I lurk are abuzz with speculation about rejections and waitlisting. And reading those posts is certainly NOT helping.

If I haven't received a mail, does it mean I'm on a waitlist? Does it mean I'm out of the running? Should I be sending telepathic "Accept-me" signals to this program? Should I move on? All this guesswork is
a) driving me crazy
b) adding to the already overwhelming uncertainty in my life and
c) distracting me from more important things.**

Dear Top-Choice-School, Why not send out the rejections along with the acceptances? What is this sinister stringing along of people? What do you get out of it, really?

I'm reminded of a time (a while ago) when I was in a similar situation with a program which I (with all the naivete of youth) believed was my ticket to awesomeness and attractiveness. The standardized tests were  gruelling, the wait, long and the process as a whole, excruciating. That process, however, was much, much more transparent that this one. You made a cut-off, you knew you'd get shortlisted for the first round.
I'm voting more transparency in the admissions process, really.
Ooh, in retrospect, another upside was that I made a couple of fantastic friends along the way.

*Shrug*. Oh well, there is a lesson in everything, I suppose. Now all I have to do, is find a shovel and dig one out of this. Or just Zen this out.

*= more greys.
**like actual homework, thesis, class planning etc. 

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